motherofresistance: (Sad)
motherofresistance ([personal profile] motherofresistance) wrote 2016-12-22 04:46 am (UTC)

Doctor Kalonia endured Ben's outburst without flinching. She'd expected the anger, fear, and denial. As a doctor, she'd dealt with those from her patients before. But the despair, the way he just deflated in complete defeat? That was the worst. She'd seen similar expressions on the faces of some of the Hosnian survivors she'd treated; utterly lost and desolate.

"Ben," she said gently but with conviction, "it's alright to be afraid. I won't tell you not to be because this is a frightening situation. And I understand the fear of losing people you care for to this war; I feel it every time someone is brought into my med bay. I fear that one day I won't be fast enough, skilled enough, knowledgeable enough to save them. Your mother may be in command but everyone on this base is under my care, and that includes you. And speaking both as a doctor and as a friend of your mother, I can tell you one thing; I want you and everyone else here to be as healthy as possible, in body and mind."

"In your situation, I have to think about the body first," she explained. "Because the state of your body affects so much of what I can do, and if your body falls apart, then nothing I do to help your mind will ultimately matter. But while things like food and supplements will be a necessary part of your treatment, they won't be all of it. I want all of you to be healthy. Just like your mother does."

"Which is why it's time to get to dealing with the root of the problem," she said, moving to a nearby cabinet and retrieving a device that looked like some sort of strange headband made of flexible metal with several bits of delicate instrumentation attached from a protective case within. "This is a specialized scanner that measures brain activity and neurotransmitter levels in great detail. With this, I'll be able to see exactly what's going on in your head, and using that, will be able to come up with a complete treatment plan for you that includes you body and mind. And find a way to prevent your episodes of depersonalization that doesn't involve harming yourself or risking your life."

Leia didn't move from Ben's side during the doctor's entire explanation, torn between worry and fear at the deep self-loathing and despair that dominated Ben's mind and trying to pay attention to what the doctor was saying, lest she miss some important detail. -Always love you. Always. I'm here for you, Ben. My Ben. My boy. Don't give up.- The thoughts and feelings were offered gently to Ben through the Force, but their strength was undeniable. -Not alone, Ben. Never again. Love you so much.- She wasn't about to let him give up, not now, when they were so close to a solution. Not if there was anything at all she could do to help.

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